Love and Friends

I’ve never been in love. At least I don’t think I have. What is love really? I believe that there is a difference between loving someone and being in love with someone. I mean I love my good friends more than probably anything in this world, but I’ve never actually been in love with anyone. Maybe what I felt in my lifetime was just lust, but feelings don’t always make sense. They say that the heart wants what the heart wants… I don’t know if I believe in that. One time while my friend was talking about his girlfriend of over 2 years, I asked him, so what is love like? He tells me, “Have you ever been to Cedar Point? Well love is like that one wooden roller coaster there.” He said that, you want to go on it even though it is kind of sketchy and there are times on that roller coaster that are a lot of fun, but then again it also can get painful.  I just looked at him and thought he was a genius. I mean even though I’ve never felt a love like that before, I could understand that. I mean I’ve seen love like that before.

            In my life I dated a few girls, but never had a serious girlfriend. One of the strangest dating things was when I was a senior in high school. I’m lucky that I got out when I did because I found out she was kind of crazy. The funny thing is that me dating her started off as a joke. I played football and she was a cheerleader. So one day me being stupid I just looked at her and said, “Hey girl, you sitting with me at team dinner?” She got this really confused look on her face, and then said, “If you want me to…” Well later that night we had that team dinner. She didn’t sit with me so me being stupid again I walked up sat beside her and chatted her up. As a side note I’m not normally the type of guy that does this, or at least I’m not good at it, but I have days where I’m more outgoing then others. Yeah I know I’m strange. After all this she began to want to talk to me more and let me know she was into me, and I was like this is weird. I didn’t really want anything to do with a relationship at the time. It ended pretty fast.

            I also remember in my senior year in high school I made a lot more friends and started to grow apart from some other ones that were once best friends. I don’t really know how it happened, but in my senior year I became more popular. I think it was because I was on video announcements and people thought I was funny. More people wanted to be my friend, and I welcomed it. I remember though that the crew that I hung out with for most of my high school life and a lot from before that started to leave me out of things. I never really understood why, but honestly at my current state I could care less. They have disappointed me a number of times and I honestly believe them to no longer be my friends.

            The people that I love most in my life are the best friends that I made while I’ve been in college, and like 2 people from my hometown. I mean they make me feel so much happier. They are the best people to hang out with, and they always seem to have my back. I’ve been through a lot with these people and I don’t know what I’d do without them. I know that in my life friendship is one of the most important things in my life. I’ve always been good because of the friends that were with me along the way. Man, I know that I would lay down my own life for these people. I’ve always liked to help and do nice things for my friends because that is what always makes me feel good. They say that you determine your own happiness, and I believe this to be true in most parts, but I know that having friends like I have has made being happy a whole heck of a lot easier.

            Just sitting down and talking with my friends is even great. I mean we go out and do fun things together, but when you can connect with somebody on more of a personal level I believe that it makes friendships much more stronger. I remember having conversations with my one of my friends about our past experiences and how similar they were or the time I talked with another one of my friends and we talked about how we were going to move to a beach and start a shop that sells tanks, and then with the money we make from that we were going to make a documentary about looking for buried treasure in the ocean, and I would be the boat captain because I've always wanted to be one. Then eventually become really wealthy. I figure I want to live on a beach in the future because I talked to another one of my friends saying how we wanted to live next to each other on the beach and have parties by our houses.

            Friends are the most important things to me because friends are what keep me going in life. I know that I can call up this select few of people and they will be there because we are friends. I know there was a time that it was hard to tell if people were my friends. Like I knew they were my friend, but I wasn’t sure if I was their friend. I learned that these people were just fake and I had no need for them to even be my friend, especially because I have some real good best friends. I know that we will stay in contact even though it’ll be hard over this summer. I will need to see them because I’ve spent an entire school year with these people and it is going to be hard to not see them for an entire summer. Plans have already been made for things to do this summer with my friends, and I’m sure new plans will be made. I’m planning on visiting someone from college when I’m not with my parents or working over this summer.